So, this doesn't happen too much, but I have been thinking about a comment I made in my message on Sunday. I was discussing parenting and made the comment that Christians have started to characterize their families and the rearing of their children with the idea of "safe Christian kids." My point was that we have become scared. We are afraid of everything and anything that might be "worldly" and damage our children. The more I thought about this the more I believe we as Christians need to step up to the plate and say, "Yes, I am guilty of this too."
Think about it for a minute. For example, many Christians don't send their kids to public school. Why? We can say whatever we want, but I would argue that primarily it is fear. It may be fear of academics - God forbid that our children don't get the best academic education they could possibly get. After all, this is the whole point of parenting isn't it? To produce super smart kids? That sure seems to be God's number one priority (sarcasm in this last statement). Or it may be fear of "worldly" influence. Once again, God forbid that our children interact with unsaved people on a daily basis and get introduced to sin. I want to take just a minute to talk about this fear, which is rooted in a false theology of sin and holiness.
First of all, this fear assumes that sin is something outside of us, like a force that must be fought off. However, the Bible is very clear that sin isn't an outside force, but something that is within us. Sin springs from the depravity of our own hearts. Too often we view our families as fortresses. If we can just raise the walls (standards) high enough and lift up the drawbridge then we can keep sin out of our kids lives. But this is actually unbiblical. We are nowhere commanded to keep our kids from sinning or interacting with sinners. Instead, we are commanded to teach our children to love God (Dt 6). God is more concerned with the inward character of the heart than the externals. Why are we so afraid of the worlds influence on our children?
Second, this fear reveals our primary concern is protecting our children rather than preparing our children. I hear this all the time. Isn't our role as parents to protect our children from sin and other evil influences? Well, to a certain extent, sure, that is part of our role. The problem I have with this is that we have really made this our only or primary role. We have turned Christian families into chicken coops rather than eagles dens. We are like the mother hen covering her chicks from the evil world out there. But we should be like the eagle who takes its young on its back to great heights and then drops them. As they fall it swoops around teaching and showing them how to fly (preparation). If the baby eagle doesn't get it then the mother grabs them (protection) and takes them up again to try again. Instead, we are like parents teaching our kids to swim on the living room floor. We want them to swim, but we are so afraid they might drown that we never let them go to the pool. We are telling our kids how to do the crawl, and the backstroke, and the breaststroke, but they have never got in the water. We have got to prepare our children to make a difference in the world around them, but they will not be prepared to interact with the world and share their faith if they have never been taught by their parents.
So, my challenge to you is this. Look at your family. Are you parenting by fear. Constantly making decisions to protect your children. Or are you parenting by grace. Constantly preparing your children for the trials and adventure ahead of them as a Christian spreading the light of God's Word to others around them?
Then look at your own life. Are you living in fear? If you are, do a study of the life of Jesus or the life of Paul. I guarantee you will see great examples of men who both lived in contact with the worst of society (prostitutes, gangsters, extortioners, burglars, outcasts, homeless, adulterers, etc.) and yet didn't fall into sin. Stop being a "safe Christian."
